new year’s resolutions
01 Jan 2011

The Alchemical Slinky of Personal Transformation

No Comments Relationships, Self Development and Transformation, Technology and Change

I believe that history has a funny (not always ha-ha) way of repeating itself, both personally and globally. It makes me feel better when I catch myself seemingly repeating the same behaviors over and over again to think that it isn’t just me slipping into those old patterns. You do it too, right?

History repeats itself because we often (usually subconsciously) seek out excuses in order to justify acting a particular way:
*Well, because I only quit smoking for a year last time, the likelihood is that I won’t really make it that far this time.
*I always eat too much over the holidays so I assume I’ll do the same this year.
*I’m typically weak when it comes to that ex-him or her, so the likelihood is that I’ll sleep with them again if they come knocking.

Let’s take this simple concept that most of us would agree upon a step further. C.G. Jung suggested that there is a direct correlation between my personal process and the process of humanity as a whole. Somehow the decision tree whereby I calculate the choice not to sleep with that person because I can choose a better path now as opposed to before is indeed a universal progression not limited to my own little drama. Isn’t it yours as well…?

“An archetypal image transmutes our personal destiny into the destiny of humankind” (Collected Works of C.G. Jung, 15/129). A common symbol, idea, experience, even a common dream, has the ability to connect my inner and outer world with your inner and outer world, linking my personal journey to the path of humanity as a whole. There is a certain magic to this concept that makes the world an even more fascinating, more alchemical place to live.

Alchemy is the ancient study (some adepts would suggest practice) whereby putrifaction leads to the transmutation of matter, most notably of metals into gold. The notion that we can seemingly convert static objects and states like stone or metal into a state of change and transformation was a process that intrigued many people before we were given the brain-numbing answer to free time and boredom, reality television. People living only a hundred years ago used to pursue the alchemical mysteries like folks today chase dreams of creating an internet start-up company or a new app for a smart phone.

It was commonly believed that for a person to attain the knowledge whereby an alchemical conversion was possible, a deep process of self-realization and personal development was essential. In this technologically advanced age, video games, Facebook, Twitter and TV in general, not just the reality kind, are things one would arguably need to suspend during the intensive, introspective, transformational process. Creating gold out of old Matchbox cars and cell phones takes focus. Some would say it requires a degree of enlightenment.

The Latin definition of Alchemy, Solve et Coagula can be translated as separate and come together, dissolve and coagulate. Those are VERY intriguing words for a psychotherapist, and I imagine for many others as well.

Jung suggested that the alchemy of the Self is a process whereby the individual exfoliates, even burns, layers of the self away to reveal the truest, most enlightened, version of our being. Alchemists of the Middle Ages believed that the person who could turn common metals into gold would need to have discovered a panacea, a veritable elixir of life, because it would necessarily be the universal solvent that when mixed with whatever form of matter, creates a metaphysical play dough that can be shaped into whatever the Alchemist chooses.

Following this so far? It’s the key to eternal life (and a reduced need for psychotherapy) so stay with me.

In order to transform the self I have thus far manifested in my relationships, my thoughts and in my life story, I need to uncover a personal elixir, a universal substance (or idea) that allows me to dissolve the places I am stuck and then draw together my broken pieces into a new, more empowered and enlightened form. That’s what I do when I do the work on myself to change old patterns that create harm or hurt for myself and others: I dissolve the old and form new ways of relating. It is also the process I personally strive to facilitate for clients each day in their therapeutic discovery and psycho-analysis.

Which brings me back to Time. I have a tendency (as do many good humans) to view my life historically, through the relationships I have created, maintained and dissolved. I conduct this self-analysis by understanding those connections through the context of time and space as well as my judgment of how I conducted myself in those situations. Hopefully, I view my past in terms of events and behaviors I want to learn from and improve.

For example, “I was a real jerk to that person in college, but I was just a kid trying to figure things out…”

“I ended up having that affair back then because I was longing for love and partnership but I wasn’t fully capable of committing so I chose someone who wasn’t truly available… “

“I chose to marry my husband or wife because I had done enough work on myself, dissolved and coagulated, and felt capable of creating a new version of who I am throughout time and space that, like gold (and Frosted Lucky Charms), I perceived to be magically delicious.”

There is a recursive regression that occurs in and for my self out of my own alchemical process whereby I transform myself in this moment as a result of a series of similarly transformational but static moments in my past. Like Bill Murray in “Groundhog Day,” recursion suggests that I am able to define my present state of conscious awareness by relying on a series of moments from the past when I believed I was indeed fully conscious. And yet, like two mirrors facing each other, I am able to see the mirror exactly in front only combined with a series of reflections of the same mirror somehow projected within the image.

Is it possible to perceive the changes I am making right now in the way I do “me” outside of or separate from the moments in my past when I was also conscious of change happening?

Is this possible without a universal solvent? Is there a panacea that allows me to solve et coagula?
There must be some common denominator throughout time and space that allows me to view myself as a self-aware person within a process of transformation. Relying upon this element, I build each moment of transformation upon itself, erecting a metaphysical slinky that when stretched and pulled forward enough, eventually snaps all of my past experiences and internal movements of consciousness forward in an instant. It soars through time and space and slams into the present moment at a grand, alchemical intersection of evolution, transformation, and perhaps even enlightenment. It changes us forever.

As we begin another year in the life, I’d like to invite you to take some time in the coming weeks to consider what constant has existed throughout your life that has helped you dissolve and coagulate. Perhaps it is not something you have ever contemplated and yet it might be something worth identifying, appreciating and nurturing as you move forward on your personal path to self-realization. What idea or belief, physical place, activity, relationship, etc. has truly served as a catalyst for growth and transformation in your life? Are you aware of your universal solvent? Perhaps it is time to become aware and pull the slinky of change forward…

Happy New Year!!!

15 Dec 2010

A Little Intention for OLD LANGZYNE…

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2010 has been an amazing year in my life. I have been both grateful for incredible blessings and awestruck by intense challenges. I have been touched and surprised by the goodness and love in people as well as pained and dismayed by spite and projection from people. I have experienced moments of greatness from myself and moments of personal disappointment and frustration. Above all, I have been both a witness and a creator of my life, moving through time and space as a willing partner, striving to be more conscious, loving and at peace.

So, when I consider the past year and the year to come, I acknowledge that I stand at the intersection of two profound places: That which was, and that which is to come. The point where I stand, is of course, the present moment where everything exists and everything is possible. What powerful consciousness it is to be in this place!!!

Which brings me to consider the level of intention that I place on New Year’s Eve. When the clock strikes midnight, where am I, really? Who am I being? What am I manifesting, creating, promoting? So, I ask of you:

What makes your New Year happy?

How do you usher in the new year? Are you the kind of person that has three parties on tap for the night and you don’t leave each one until you’ve tapped three drinks from each spot? Are you the stay at home and watch the ball drop from the couch person? Or perhaps you’ve got reservations for two at a swanky dress-up for foam dinner with champagne included?

No matter what you’ve got in store, the question that matters most (in my opinion) is the intention you set for whatever you choose to do. I am fascinated by the common belief that a person needs to be inebriated when the clock strikes 12 on New Year’s Eve in order to really “do it right.” What a funny way to set the tone for a new chapter in your personal history. It goes something like this on the first day back to work:

“How was your New Year’s?” “Oh my God, I was SO inebriated!”

“Awesome!”

Really? Awesome? Is this how we do it? That’s how we roll? I am often curious whether we are actually celebrating or numbing. What does it really suggest about where I’m at in my life when I start my new year semi-conscious or blacked out? Or is it about the year I have just completed? Am I celebrating the fact that I survived a horrible year by drowning its memory from my awareness?
What would happen if I were to stand at the intersection of two units of time and space with the conscious awareness of what I have accomplished, survived or experienced and the intention and potential of that which I choose to create in the future?

Years ago I joined author Natalie Goldberg at her home in Taos, NM for a Mindful New Year’s Party. Her meditation teacher led a small group of her friends in an evening of chants and meditations, gongs and bells, tea and rice. We were so entranced that we missed midnight by twenty minutes.

Another year, I joined a group of mostly strangers at a private home in Santa Fe for an evening of Native American totems and animal guests, break-out process sessions geared to raise awareness of personal challenges and intentions for the coming year. There was also some killer green chile dip.

Don’t get me wrong, I have had my share of drunken parties in my time. I’ve stumbled through the mayhem of Times Square, oinked my way through a pig roast luau on Maui, and I have even yawned at Dick Clark from my couch with sparking cider. They were all fine experiences and I have nothing against a good party.

But when it comes to intention, I have some opinions. How do I choose to live my life? How do I create my reality? Where is my focus? Am I mindful right now? Is this the human I want to be? Where am I really going in my life starting tomorrow, today, yesterday?

Try it. Whether you shell out large bills on dinner or shell it out into a porcelain bowl, you choose the person you are being at any given moment. Set your intention, create your reality, manifest your best self. It’s just another opportunity to be awesome!!!

If your life takes you on a path to do work together and create the life you want to manifest, I am honored to be a part of it. If your relationship is ready to learn and facilitate new tools and create new ways of communicating, I’m grateful for your trust. If I have done anything to upset, hurt or wound you in any way this past year, I humbly ask for your forgiveness. If your wisdom leads you in a different direction, I’m so pleased that our paths have crossed and I wish you tremendous success, peace and love in your life in 2011.